We are entering week three of self-quarantine thanks to the spread of COVID-19. Staying at home day in and day out, not leaving except to walk the dog and not driving anywhere but the grocery store has been a fascinating experience. As an introvert (I am a pure INFJ on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator), when I first heard the news about self-quarantine I said, “Oh, I’ve got this. I’ve been training for this my whole life!” (Giggling under my breath.) But something shifts when you have been ordered to stay inside when going outside and coming into contact with other humans could be detrimental to your health and possibly theirs is another story entirely. While I tend to be compliant and a rule-follower, I do have a rebellious streak. At first, I felt a bit defiant, and honestly, in a lot of denial about the seriousness of this thing. I know that I am not sick, nor have I been in contact with anyone who is sick. But I don’t know with whom other people have been in contact. If I want to help “flatten the curve” of infections, I can do my part by keeping my rebellious behind at home.
My spiritual community held church services online yesterday, and about 60 or so people participated. It was a fun way to connect with my spiritual family from a safe distance. Rev. Joel Fotinos, who is an associate pastor at my church mentioned that he heard someone say that self-quarantine is like the universe telling everyone to go to their room and think about what they have done. I am choosing to treat it as an extended spiritual retreat. I am treating this as a sacred time that I can spend focusing on my spiritual and personal development. Last week was an art week. I did a big mixed-media art project and I made four art journals and one blank journal for a class I’m taking called, Pull, Pen, Paint with the fabulous Kiala Givehand.
What I love about this situation is that it seems to have come to teach each of us an individualized lesson. For some people, it might have come to teach them that they don’t know as much about their children as they thought they did. For others, it might have come to show them how much they rely on the distractions of work, socializing, etc. For me, it has come to teach me how much I have taken those I love for granted. It has come to teach me how selfish I have been with my time and attention, and it is revealing to me the need to deepen my relationship with God.
I am blessed to be a healer, a prayer practitioner, and a seminary student. However, those trappings do not insulate me from fear. When the haze of complete denial was lifted from me, I’m gonna be honest, I had a bit of a freak-out moment. (I’m not giggling anymore.) I began to think about what this crisis is going to do to our economy, and what might happen if the people I know and love get sick. What if I got sick? I began to think about how my life will never be what it was pre-COVID-19, but I have no idea what it will be going forward. But the beautiful part is that I get to decide. I can create a whole new future for myself. And I get to trust that I am divinely guided and supported and that all is well.
As I learn to navigate that #lockdownlife and deal with the challenges of #quarantinelife, I remember that God is always with me, it is within me and it is expressing itself through me and as my life in every moment. God is in this whole situation. God is speaking to this storm as this storm. I am praying for a halt to the spread of new cases of the virus. I am praying for healing for those who are sick with it. I am praying that each of us learns to be obedient and follow the rules that the government established to help curb the spread of the virus. I am praying that each of us learns the unique lessons that this bug came to teach us so that it can fade away to dust and allow us to get on with our new lives.
